“My philosophy
like colour TV
is all there
in black and white”
Monty Python
Drink
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Anonymous
A meal without wine is called a commuter's breakfast.
Anonymous
Alcohol and calculus don't mix: don't drink and derive.
Anonymous
Alcohol puts the wreck back into recreation.
Anonymous
Anyone who can turn water into wine is bound to have a following.
Anonymous
Beer is the reason I wake up every afternoon.
Anonymous
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony.
Robert Benchley (1889-1945)
Drunkenness is temporary suicide: the happiness that it brings is merely negative, a momentary cessation of unhappiness.
Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)
Every loaf of bread is a tragic reminder of cereals that never became beer.
Anonymous
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat drinking beer all day.
Anonymous
Having a wonderful wine, wish you were beer.
Anonymous
I only drink a little but then I change into another person and that person drinks a lot.
Anonymous
I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.
Anonymous
I'm not as thrunk as drinkle peep I am.
Anonymous
I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.
Anonymous
It only takes one drink to get me drunk, but I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
George Burns (1896-1996)
Maturity is realising that you don't need fun to have alcohol.
Anonymous
Never bet your bladder against a brewery.
Anonymous
Only Irish Coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
P.J. O'Rourke (1947-2022)
Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
Anonymous
People talk of my drinking but never of my thirst.
Anonymous
People who don't drink wake up in the morning and that's the best they are going to feel all day.
Dean Martin (1917-1995)
There is nothing which has yet been contrived by man by which so much happiness is produced as by a good tavern.
Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)
Water is for washing, if you don't eat soap why drink water.
Anonymous
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
Anonymous